Happy Holidays!

Happy Holidays!

How to have a harmonious and happy festive season

It's the season for goodwill. But your goodwill might end up being stretched to breaking point if you are faced with a grumpy relative, a tipsy friend or a screaming child, while you try to serve up the turkey.

Gathering together family and friends - who may or may not get along - in a small space for hours, can be an explosive situation! During the festive season, expectations are often unrealistically high for having the perfect day on December 25. But high expectations can leave you feeling stressed and pressured as you struggle to keep family and friends happy. Under pressure, it's easy to exchanged angry words with your nearest and dearest. Stress is increased if you know you have to cater for a difficult family member or face a person with whom you don't see eye-to-eye. But don't panic! If you can have a stress-free, harmonious Christmas if you slightly shift your expectations by adopting a more spiritual mindset and following some practical tips to keep friends and family smiling.

Take a Spiritual Approach...

1) Perfection is a myth

So what if the potatoes aren't crispy enough or you forgot to buy the Christmas cake! It's really not the end of the world if things don't go exactly to plan. You have your family around you to celebrate - that's what really matters, not how accomplished your cooking is or how fancily you have decorated the house. Keep expectations realistic and you'll always have a good day.

2) Be grateful

Perhaps you're disappointed with a present you received? You're not satisfied with the food, the decorations, the drinks or the people? Stop right there! Think of it another way: what are you thankful for? You have enough to eat and drink. You are warm and safe. You have clothes to wear and your vision and hearing. You have a family and friends. Be glad. But being grateful isn't just about realising how fortunate you are in comparison to much of the world. It will help you to find a sense of inner peace and calm. Let go of your compulsion to compete and compare yourself with others. Accept what you have, Be grateful. Be glad.

3) Be kind

Nobody is perfect - that includes you, too! So try to be kind, even to those whom you find irritating or obnoxious. You'll often find that if you show kindness to somebody who seems hostile, their hostility will melt away and a nicer person will emerge. This is because anger, boasting or other unpleasant personality traits are often a cover for deep seated insecurity. So be kind to your grumpy relative or obnoxious teenager over Christmas and you will, hopefully, find they calm down and behave themselves for the day!

Family & Friends

Here's how to deal with people in festive social situations to keep Christmas gatherings harmonious and conflict-free!

*Your Romantic Partner

DO: Offer to share out the chores before the big day arrives so everybody does their fair share. Grab 10 minutes alone time to exchange gifts. Be grateful for your gift, even if you wouldn't have picked it yourself.

DON'T: Don't criticise their relatives. Don't drink too much.

*Your Parents

DO: Let them help out if they want to - they might want to feel useful. Designate one task they can perform, such as setting the table.

DON'T: Let them take over! It's your house. Don't try to change any of their old habits today, but do ensure they respect your house rules.

*Your Adult Children

DO: Treat them like grown-ups, not children! Tell them what you expect of them instead of being angry, for example, that they didn't realise you wanted them to help in the kitchen.

DON'T: Criticize their partner or lifestyle. Today is not the right time for this type of conversation.

*Your relatives

DO: Sit people next to each other who you know will get along. Be understanding of any sensitive subjects and move the conversation along and away from those subjects.

DON'T: Keep re-filling their wine glass. Inebriated guests are more likely to quarrel.

*Your friends

DO: Good friends are precious, so make sure you nurture your relationship by communicating, listen and showing you care by the way you act towards them.

DON'T: Don't bear grudges. Assume a good friend means well, so if they say something you don't like, question it, but then let it go.